Loss..

They were married for over four years; as every young couple they always carried with them a dream to have children and make a family of there own. However the man upstairs was never kind to them. Two years down their married life; she called him one day, a fine afternoon he remembers she said " I love you; finally I am gonna be a mother". There joy knew no bounds, the waits been long however finally the gift of a child.

Frequent hospital visits and baby journals kept her busy all day; they whispered sweet nothings to the baby in the night, they even started arguments about baby names. It was almost the fourth month; a usual hospital visit it should have been. The waiting all that they could keep thinking in their head was we are gonna hear our babies heart beat. The last time was so special more like the perfect rhythmic music. Those heart beats kept them alive for a month here they were finally time for new rhythms.

The doc finally called them in, usual question and chatting took a few minutes; she was called up to the Scanning table. Probe was probing her stomach line they waited in anticipation to hear a sound which would keep them moving another month. She held his hands tighter. Doc eyes seemed to be asking tons of questions as he kept probing; sudden deafness filled the room, everything seemed so slow. The probing was lasting even longer the doc said I am finding it difficult to hear a heart beat. His heart felt very heavy, he looked at her reassuring her that everything is going to be ok. Finally a small beat filled the emptiness in the room and the doc said "where have you been hiding kiddo?" Tears rolled down her eyes as Doc said " we need to give her some supporting medicines.. heart beats are very faint.. please come in tomorrow for another scan.."

The next 24 hours lasted more like an eternity; they rarely talked. The worried silence spoke more than ever. His reassurance was all that she had. She would just gently pat her stomach as if her fingers were telling her child not to go anywhere. Time seemed like an eternity, each moment felt so lethal. He did seem so brave; when he felt he could not hold on anymore he ran to the rest room; sat on his knees.. tears rolling down his eyes; a pain did he feel that he could not express, his tears did most of the talking.

It was time again; they were the last ones to see the doc; she called them in; tools in place. The doctors search for life was on. She held his hands.. it did not take long for the doc to say the words they did not want to hear " I am sorry".

Tears rolled down her eyes; he had no words to pacify her. All they could do was carry her baby who had no life inside her till the doctors could take the child out of her. The pain... the loss ... had no words.. silence said it all...